Saturday, January 30, 2016

2015 NFL Kings of the Cellar

Wow, start a new job and it takes up most of your time. I apologize for the delay.

Well, it appears once again that the 3-13 Cleveland Browns snatched defeat from the jaws of victory by losing the first pick in the draft. Close, but no cigar.  They will have to watch while another team enjoys the beer in the cellar.

Congrats to the 3-13 Tennessee Titans! They are the 2015 NFL Kings of the Cellar and winners of the coveted first overall pick in the 2016 NFL Draft. Their four game losing streak and loss to the Browns in Week 2 sealed the Cellar door and the win.

There are a few honorable mentions this year. The first one goes to the Dirty Birds themselves, the 8-8 Atlanta Falcons. They started 5-0 and forgot how to play winning football, finishing the season at 3-8. The second one goes to 4-12 Dallas Cowboys for their collapse when Tony Romo went down. Finally, the last honorable mention goes to the New Orleans Saints defense, especially CB Brandon Browner, who was the most penalized player in the league and whose penalties at key points during the season cost the 7-9 Saints at least three wins.

As much fun as we have with the updates, it's important to remember that the Last Place Updates are a tongue-in-cheek look at teams with the worst records in the featured sports on this blog. However, only a tiny percent of the population is good enough to even be a professional athlete. It's also important to remember and appreciate that it takes that special kind of athlete to earn the privilege to play for a professional sports team, whether it's for only a few games or a long Hall of Fame career. The rest of us can only dream of the life these people live, regardless of how good or bad their team is.

Congrats to the NFL for a good season!!!

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Last Place Update - December 24

Merry Christmas everybody! It appears the 4-10 San Diego Chargers wanted something other than the beer in the Cellar when they beat the 5-9 Miami Dolphins. Henceforth (at least this week), this week's Kings of the Cellar are the 3-11 Tennessee Titans and Cleveland Browns. Why? As the great John Blutarski once said, "Why not?" The Titans have only one division and home win and Cleveland is...well,...just Cleveland.

Move over Dirty Birds. You're out as this week's honorable mention. That distinction now goes to the 6-8 Indianapolis Colts. Why? Because they're sporting a three game losing streak after sporting a three game winning streak after sporting a three game losing streak, while sporting...well, you get the picture. What's worse, they scored over 30 points only once this season and that was in week 3. This week, Indy visits the Miami Dolphins. Will this begin another win streak?

Next losses...

Tennessee hosts the division rival 7-7 Houston Texans. The Titans lead the series 15-12, but are 5-10 against Houston since 2008. Indy hasn't swept a season series against the Titans since 2007 and it won't happen this year either. They first met in 2002, when the Titans won 17-10. They never played against each other in the postseason, but did go to overtime twice. That series is tied 1-1. The last OT have happened in 2013 when the Texans won 30-24. There is only one shutout in the series. In 2010, Tennessee got blanked 20-0.

Cleveland will invade Arrowhead Stadium to take on the 9-5 Kansas City Chiefs. The series is tied 11-11-2. They first met after the NFL/AFL merger in 1971, when Len Dawson and the Chiefs won 13-7. They never met in the postseason, but went to overtime twice. The Chiefs won the last one in 2006, 31-28, but their first overtime game ended in a 10-10 tie in 1989, which was their last tie. Again, there is only one shutout in the series, After the 1989 tie, Kansas City spanked Cleveland in 1990, 34-0.

Here are a few historical scores for teams playing each other this week, on December 24,

2006  Carolina 10 - Atlanta 3
2006  Baltimore 31 - Pittsburgh 7
2006  Denver 24 - Cincinnati 23

On a different note, my ebook, Rickshaw, New Mexico will be free for the Kindle through Christmas weekend. If you haven't already, click the link, download your copy, and tell a friend.

Now to the burning questions of the week.

Will Tennessee wrest control of the Cellar from Cleveland? Will Cleveland win another game? Will Indy break the streaks of 3 and hold on to the honorable mention?

Stay tuned.

Have a great day!!!

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Last Place Update - December 16

So much for the crowd thinning out. Once again, there's a three-way tie and this week, the 3-10 San Diego Chargers are Kings of the Cellar. It's true that the 3-10 Cleveland Browns and 3-10 Tennessee Titans deserve a seat in the Cellar, but the Chargers earned the title this week, because they have no division wins. That and they're 1-8 since October 4. Had the Browns lost last week, they would be in sole possession of last place. Oh well.

Okay Dirty Birds, break time's over. That's right. The 6-7 Atlanta Falcons rose up and are once again this week's honorable mention. They snatched the mention from the 8-5 Minnesota Vikings by getting shut out 38-0 by the 13-0 Carolina Panthers, Carolina's first ever shutout victory over the Dirty Birds. It's the first time Atlanta has been shut out since 2004, when the Tampa Bay Buccaneers spanked them 27-0. The last time Atlanta was shut out 38-0 was in 1987 by HOFer Rickey Jackson, HOF nominee Sam Mills (who should be in the Hall of Fame) and the New Orleans Saints.

Next loss...

The San Diego Chargers will host the 5-8 Miami Dolphins on Sunday. Miami leads the series 16-14 and are 2-9 against the Dolphins since 1995. They first met in 1966, back in the AFL, when the Chargers spanked Miami 44-10. Every postseason game these two teams played in was in the divisional round. Their last playoff game was in the 1994 season, when San Diego won 22-21 and went on to lose Super Bowl XXIX. That series is tied 2-2. They went to overtime three times and the Chargers won every one. They last time the two teams went to overtime was in 1984, a 34-28 Chargers win. The last time Miami shut out San Diego was 37-0 in 2014. The last time San Diego shut out Miami was 24-0 in 1967.

Here are some historical scores for games being played this week, from December 16,

1962  St. Louis Cardinals 45 - Philadelphia 35
1978  Pittsburgh 21 - Denver 7
2002  Tennessee 24 - New England 7
2012  Houston 29 - Indianapolis 17

Will San Diego hold on to their place in the Cellar? Will Atlanta rise up and lose the rest of their games? Will Cleveland even score against Seattle?

Stay tuned.

Have a great day!!!

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Last Place Update - December 9

The crowd has thinned this week, because we have only one team by the beer. That's right. The 2-10 Cleveland Browns are this week's Kings of the Cellar, kicking out the 3-9 Tennessee Titans over their shootout win over the 4-8 Jacksonville Jaguars. The Titans finally got their first home, division, and conference win of the season. However, breathing down Cleveland's necks are the Titans and the 3-9 San Diego Chargers, so the Brownies had better be vigilant if they want the first pick of the 2016 NFL Draft.

The 6-6 Atlanta Falcons get a break this week, so the honorable mention goes to the 4-8 St. Louis Rams. The Rams are losers of five straight and lost their last two games by a score of 58-10. Their last two wins came against teams with losing records as does this week's opponent, the 4-8 Detroit Lions. Can St. Louis bring back The Greatest Show On Turf this week?

Next loss...

Cleveland will host the 4-8 San Francisco 49ers on Sunday. Believe it or not, the Browns lead the series 11-7 and are 3-1 against the Niners since 1993. Then again, there was that hiatus when the original Browns moved to Baltimore, but that's another story for another day. They first met in the AAFL in 1946, when the 49ers won 34-20. They never met in overtime, but they did meet in the postseason. In 1949, the Browns won the final All-American Football League championship over the Niners 21-7. The last time Cleveland shut out San Francisco was 7-0 in 1974. San Francisco has never shut out Cleveland.

Here are some historical scores for teams playing each other this week, December 9,

1951  Detroit 24 - Los Angeles Rams 22
1990  Washington 10 - Chicago 9
2012  Carolina 30 - Atlanta 20

Okay, since there are only three, here some more historical scores from December 10,

1961  Houston Oilers 48 - New York Titans 21
1977  Cincinnati 17 - Pittsburgh 10
1995  Indianapolis 41 - Jacksonville 31
2006  Jacksonville 44 - Indianapolis 17
2012  New England 42 - Houston 14

Much better.

Will Cleveland provide the 49ers with their first ever shutout of the Browns? Will the Titans and Chargers barge into the Cellar? Will Atlanta lose again to be next week's honorable mention?

Stay tuned.

Have a great day!!!

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Last Place Update - December 2

Okay, it's a little tight, but there's enough room. This week, we'll honor two teams. The 2-9 Cleveland Browns and 2-9 Tennessee Titans are this week's Kings of the Cellar. Cleveland is sporting a six game losing streak, while the Titans haven't won any home, division, or conference games. That and they're on a three game skid. Neither team should get comfortable, because the 3-8 Dallas Cowboys, San Diego Chargers, and San Francisco 49ers are a game back.

This week's honorable mention goes once again to the 6-5 Atlanta Falcons. Once again, the Dirty Birds rose up and snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. Now Atlanta is 1-5 since losing to my Saints. Can they beat an improving Jameis Winston and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers?

Next loss...

Cleveland will host the Cincinnati Bengals on Sunday. The Browns trail the series 39-45 and are 7-16 since 2004. They first met in 1970 when Cleveland won 30-27. Paul Brown's Bengals won their second ever meeting and he called it the greatest win of his career. They never played each other in the postseason, but they did go to overtime four times. The overtime series is tied 2-2, with their last OT game being a 23-20 Cleveland loss in 2009. The last time Cincinnati shut out Cleveland was 30-0 last season. In fact, the Bengals shut out the Brownies 30-0 before, in 2006, and 14-0 in 2008. The last time Cleveland shut out Cincinnati was 18-0 in 2001.

Tennessee will go for their first win at home against the Jacksonville Jaguars. The Titans lead the series 23-19 and are 8-7 against the Jags since 2008. They first met in 1995 when the then Houston Oilers won 10-3. They met only once in the posteason. In the 1999 AFC Championship game, the Titans went on to Super Bowl XXXIV with a 33-14 victory. They never went to overtime nor has either team ever shut out the other.

Here are some historic scores from teams playing each other this week, December 2,

1945  Detroit 14 - Green Bay 3
1984  New York Giants 20 - New York Jets 10
1984  Cincinnati 20 - Cleveland 17 (OT)
1990  Atlanta 23 - Tampa Bay 17
2001  New Orleans 27 - Carolina 23
2001  Dallas 20 - Washington 14

Who will break the tie to take the Cellar? Will the Dirty Birds win another game? Will Dallas remain winless without Tony Romo at quarterback?

Stay tuned.

Have a great day!!!

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Last Place Update - November 24

It's getting a little crowded in the Cellar. However, there can only be one this week. The 2-8 Cleveland Browns get the boot in favor of this week's Kings of the Cellar, the 2-8 San Diego Chargers. Although the 2-8 Tennessee Titans have no division, conference, or home wins, the Chargers have something the other two 2-8 teams don't have: a six game losing streak. Cleveland is right behind San Diego with a five game losing skid, but it's not enough to take the Cellar.

This week's honorable mention goes to the Dirty Birds themselves, the 6-4 Atlanta Falcons. After going 5-0, the Falcons went 1-4 and will host an improved Minnesota Vikings this week. NFL analysts say the Matt Ryan has regressed in recent weeks. Let's see which Matty Ice shows up this week.

Next loss...

San Diego will host the 4-6 Jacksonville Jaguars. The Chargers lead the series 5-2 and are on a four game winning streak against Jacksonville. They first met in 2003, when the Jags won 27-21. They have never gone to overtime nor have they played each other in the postseason. Neither team has ever shut out the other.

Here are some historical scores for teams playing each other this week from November 24,

1940  New York Giants 21 - Washington 7
1974  New York Jets 17 - Miami 14
1986  Miami 45 - New York Jets 3
2013  Tennessee 23 - Oakland 19
2013  New England 34 - Denver 31 (OT)

Will San Diego hold on to the Cellar? Will Cleveland or Tennessee make a move? Will the Dirty Birds continue their collapse by letting Adrian Peterson run all over them?

Stay tuned.

Have a great day!!!

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Last Place Update - November 17

Meet the new Kings of the Cellar; definitely not the same as the old Kings, thanks to the 2-7 Detroit Lions' win over the Green Bay Packers. This week's Kings of the Cellar are the 2-8 Cleveland Browns. The Browns are enjoying a 5 game losing streak and been scored on by 30 or more points over the last three games. Five teams are a half game back, including the division rival 2-7 Baltimore Ravens and evicted Kings of the Cellar 2-7 Detroit Lions.

This week's honorable mention goes to the 4-6 New Orleans Saints defense. Over the past three games, the sieve of a defense allowed 1,425 yards, 526 of them came courtesy of the 5-5 Washington Redskins, hence costing defensive coordinator Rob Ryan his job. Remember, the Saints passed over Super Bowl winning defensive coordinator Romeo Crennel for Ryan. New Orleans has an bye this week, so maybe the defense will show some improvement.

Next loss...

The team named after legendary coach Paul Brown has a bye this week, so the 2-7 former Houston Oilers go to sunny Florida to take on the 3-6 Jacksonville Jaguars in a divisional matchup. The now Tennessee Titans lead the series 23-18, but the Titans are 8-6 against Jacksonville since 2008. They first met in Jacksonville's inaugural season of 1995, when the Oilers won 10-3. There are no overtime or postseason games in the series. Neither team has ever shut out the other.

Here are some historical scores for teams playing each other this week, November 17,

1974  Green Bay 19 - Minnesota 7
1974  Baltimore Colts 17 - Atlanta 7
1991  Minnesota 35 - Green Bay 21
2002  Minnesota 31 - Green Bay 21

Will Cleveland's off week cost them them their spot in the Cellar? Will the 2-7 Dallas Cowboys win now that Tony Romo is back? Will the Baltimore continue to collapse their way to the Cellar?

Stay tuned.

Have a great day!!!